About Me: Thinking

So I haven't been able to blog lately because of the supercrazy schedules we've been having in school. Projects galore and exams kasi eh, tapos throw in a bit of Hilites pa. :)) It's a complicated life I live. Well, not really. Hahaha.

I just want to say that I've had some time to get to know myself more. It's interesting to find out things about yourself that you wouldn't really notice unless you paid attention. It's even more interesting to find out the flaws you have and trying to do something about it. Self-improvement can be a really difficult thing to face, but hey, it's really worth it. 

Contrary to popular belief, my greatest distraction is not computer usage. :P I actually waste more time drifting through connected thoughts during the times when I should be doing something else. Thinking, surprisingly, takes up so much time for me that it eats up quite a large part of my time in each day. Yeah, sure, it sounds kind of loser-introvert-nerd when said but my thoughts mean a lot to me. Hey, even this blog is dedicated to house and preserve the thoughts which I deem worthy of keeping for a long time. :) I just like thinking about things because I believe that doing so will give me a better understanding of my world and life. That helps me a lot.

What sucks though, is that even if I understand what's wrong and what I need to do, I have a very flimsy sense of willpower. One moment, I can be shouting at myself in my head and telling myself to fix a certain thing I noticed was wrong and the next could be spent doing the very thing I wanted to change. I have to change that about me, but trying to will be like requiring myself to enter a locked room whose only key can be found inside. The solution is within the problem.

But self-improvement has really been my main goal in recent times. I want to be better because I know I can be better. This isn't me at my full potential. And I doubt I'm anywhere close.

I need help. But in the end, it's only I who can help myself realize my goals.

-Frobby-